Stace’s Neighborhood

To see more pictures of my fabulous journey, check out the photos on my Facebook page. If we aren't FB friends, simply request to 'add' me and I'll take it from there.

Saturday morning, I had planned to leave Kippy's to visit another friend and former Shipmate. Monica is my age, remarried, and the mother of young twins. Monica's other children are my own daughter's age. Chinell, Nikki and Patrick (nickname Spaz) played together while Monica and I were stationed in Orlando. Now, Monica had two small children... you bet I was chomping at the bit to meet them! Unfortunately, Monica fell ill and was not up for a visit. Knowing full and well that this entire journey is organic, fluid, and ever changing, I assured her I understood and decided to head West on I-35. I made a hotel reservation for that evening in Las Cruces, NM and off I went.  

Nine and a half hours later I arrived at my hotel. This morning I woke up and, like a horse headed for the barn, hit I-10 for the six hour drive home!

Here I sit. Perusing countless photographs. Updating my blog. And, like the good list-a-holic that I am, listing all of the things I need to get done around here.

I will not soon forget this trip. It was my intent to outrun the lonliness of not having my beloved husband with me by keeping on the move. Along the way, I had planned visits with friends and encountered a few surprise visits with friends whose schedules opened up at the last minute. I saw everyone in my family. I visited with high-school friends. I was absolutely thrilled when a long-time friend came to have lunch with me when she figured out that I had run out of time in Florida to go to her. I will forever hold that lunch and our time together in a special place in my heart, Christi, and I can't thank you enough for making the time for me. Trigg and T, Sal and Berta, Debbie, Joe, Kippy and so many others.. thank you for your part in making this trip a trip of a lifetime! I raise my glass of wine to toast all y'all and...I thank you! 

After 31 days and 7231 miles, this fabulous journey is over. I am home.... in our home.... at the foothills of Superstition Mountain in Arizona... the only thing missing is Ken...

Christmas Eve... up early, car packed, dogs fed and ready for a road trip to Gammas. It started out as a beautiful day. We arrived in time to hide a birthday cake (for Kippy's Mom's 70th) at Kippy's Aunt Marilyn's house and then we drove to Kippy's Mom's as if we had just arrived in town. Kippy's brother, Scott, showed up about the same time. We enjoyed each other's company while presents were exchanged before heading to Aunt Marilyn's for dinner. (Check out the photos on my FB page, there are too many photos to post here.) There were so many people at Aunt Marilyn's! Kippy has a large, close family. It was a pure joy to be able to share a holiday with this fine group of Texans while my own family was so far away from me. For a while, I don't recall even an ounce of sadness - my heart was light and happy just watching these people interact and laugh and share. I never put my camera down for long - they provided ample opportunity to record this day! It was my good fortune to capture countless photos of four generations of this fine family. I will forever remember this Christmas Eve and the entire group that allowed me not only to enter their home and break bread with them but to photograph private moments of love and fellowship. Thank you, Kippy, and to your family.... because of y'all, I did, indeed, have a Merry Christmas!

As the weather moved in over Texas, Kippy and I decided we should head back to Fort Worth instead of staying the night at her Mother's house as originally planned. That being said... off we went. We did rather well at outrunning the miserable weather that was threatening to envelope us. We were about one and a half hours outside Fort Worth when Kippy made the grand decision to leave the (parking lot) interstate and opt for neighborhood streets. The interstate overpasses were iced over, cars and eighteen wheelers were stuck. We saw several cars lose their battle with the ditch and/or jersey barrier along the interstate. So, all in all, the decision to leave the interstate was a good one. Kippy instinctually weaved her way through neighborhoods which eventually led us back to her home. Once there, Kippy whipped up a batch of bodacious bloody marys! Yummo! A couple of those rounded out the evening perfectly.

For Christmas dinner, Kippy had arranged for us to enjoy the Christmas champagne brunch served at the Fort Worth Omni hotel. After reviewing their menu, we planned our eating strategy! Two trips to the oyster bar, a dozen HUGE succulent shrimp, a piece of prime rib... oh my... makes my mouth water just thinking about it! We ate... then we waddled back to her car and went home for afternoon naps! Sadly, melancholy set in and I, once again, missed my husband terribly. I tried to be sociable but eventually retired to my room for the evening.

My time with Kippy had come to an end; tomorrow I was off to visit other friends.

After visiting friends, I spent that evening in Longview, TX.  I was headed for Fort Worth but ran out of oooomph long before I ran out of highway. So I stopped for the night – a mere two hours shy of my destination. But, it was a good call – I don’t drive in the dark when I’m alone and the weather had started to take a turn. Stopping for the night was the right thing to do. I got up in the morning and headed to Fort Worth – another instance of good fortune – Longview, TX was hit by a tornado several hours after I headed out.

Fort Worth was where I was going to spend the next few days with one of my dearest friends, Kippy.  And, Kippy’s family (who live a few hours East of Fort Worth) had graciously invited me to join them for Christmas-eve dinner. A home-cooked meal, good company AND Kippy was going to be doing the driving to and from their house... I’m all over that! After I arrived earlier today, the eating began (again with the food?! OMG!!!) Kippy took me to a local market – a fabulous hangout for foodies like us! – where I got to sample seaweed salad (OMGoodness yummy!) and squid salad (ditto on the Yummo!) and we picked up a few supplies for the Christmas meal…oh, and shrimp… we couldn’t get out of the store without something to eat on the two-mile drive back to her house!

Then we were off to the Fort Worth Stockyard – a great little downtown area. I could have spent hours there. Unfortunately, we arrived just a few minutes too late to catch the afternoon walk of the long-horned steer (is that what you call them?) Daily, at 11:30 and 4:00 a cowboy (a REAL cowboy) rides on horseback alongside what looked to be six or seven steer as they walked right down the middle of the Stockyard Square. Pretty cool, indeed!  Next stop, a little shopping and the best margaritas in the Fort Worth…. complete with chips and salsa, of course! After the margaritas, well, now it was time for dinner, so off we go! Kippy had decided on a Japanese sushi house and selected some of her favorites. She frequents this place and the bartender knew how to create a favorite drink of hers – a wonderfully (surprisingly) refreshing spicy-pear martini… my goodness, someone please roll me on outta here!!!

On the way back home, Kippy drove through a neighborhood filled with homes soooo large that I actually argued that one of them HAD to be a hotel or a B&B – it was huge. From our vantage point, I could count nine sets of French doors on the front façade alone, I mean, c’mon! I know they do things bigger in Texas but that’s a little overboard, don’t ‘cha think?! Now, here I sit, all showered and too full to sleep so I decided to catch up on my blogging so some of you (and you know who you are) can get off my back about my lack of blogging! J In my own defense, it’s hard to type and eat…

We leave in the morning for Kippy’s Momma’s house where we’ll settle in for ... you guessed it…. More food and fellowship… and poker!  Stay tuned… I promise I’ll write more promptly in the future.  Now, someone pass the shrimp!

I was stationed in New Orleans (NOLA) from 1990-1993. I’ve often said it was the fastest tour of my career. There is ALWAYS something being celebrated in NOLA. I remember one day as I drove through the French Quarter on my way to work, I was detained at a traffic light while  a parade of vegetables – yep, people dressed in vegetable costumes – marched past my car. It was all part of the tomato festival – um, okay…

Another time, also in the French Quarter, I was sitting at a red light in my RX-7 with the sun roof opened when all of a sudden I heard a snorting sound and a puff of warm air – a policeman on horseback, had allowed his horse to dangle his head over my sunroof in an attempt to be funny! It was… I laughed…once my heart started beating regularly again, that is!

So, anyway, NOLA has always been a pretty special place to me. I just fell in love with the history and the architecture. And, if you ever get the opportunity to visit, do it. Don’t listen to the naysayers who badmouth this fine city. It, like all other major cities, has its flaws but in the end, you’ll be glad for the experience.  Many old friends and Shipmates remain in the area and I was able to catch up with several of them. Mind you, all visitation in the city of New Orleans includes eating – I mean, my goodness, I’m going to spend all of January in the gym to work off this cross-country trip!

So, after many visits and lots of phenomenal food, I started to wrap up my trip. I was bummed that I didn’t get an opportunity to visit with a dear friend and restaurant owner of the top-rated (truly Cajun) family restaurant on the West Bank - SALVOS. As luck would have it, as I was leaving town, I drove past his restaurant and decided to try one more time to see if he had returned from a family vacation. Much to my surprise, he had! I sat with him and his wife for a good long while. We talked of the years that had past and tried to catch up. I had worked part time at this restaurant while I was stationed in NOLA. At that time, our children were small. Chinell was in first and second grade; Sal and Berta's girls were four and five. Now, one is a college graduate and the other is graduating from college in May. Wow! That was an eye-opener!  So, after a fabulous time visiting with them and an even more fabulous (authentic) Cajun lunch… Sal helped me to my car with bags of his special seasoning, a t-shirt and a hoodie…. oh… and gumbo for when I arrived at my hotel later that day. Friends… do I know how to pick ‘em, or what?!

Next stop... Christmas at Kippy's! Fort Worth, here I come!

Exactly one week after arriving at my parent’s home, it was time to move on. I was headed to the home of long-time friends and a former Shipmate & Commanding Officer of Ken’s. Trigg (his Call Sign) and T (short for Teresa) were long-time friends of ours from our days in Lemoore, CA. They had graciously offered me a place to lay my head for the evening on my journey. What a great night! We dined at a nearby marina restaurant with live entertainment. We talked and laughed,  and played ‘remembered when’ and 'remember them' through the meal. When we returned to their gorgeous home, Trigg shared with me that he had learned to play guitar since I last saw them. So, without hesitation, his wife and I urged him to play for us. We retired to the back porch with a bottle of wine, three tasty cigars, two dogs, and one camera on a tripod… T and I took up residence in the rocking chairs and Trigg grabbed a chair from inside. And, he played. People pay a lot of money to enjoy an evening like the one we shared that night. Laughing, toasting, singing, and smoking fine cigars… man! I am blessed to have such great friends! In the morning, I loaded up the Tahoe and moved on down the road: destination New Orleans.

I arrived at Mom and Dad’s house – home – a little earlier than expected. I arrived to find ‘my room’ ready for my belongings and enveloped in a feeling of sweet utopia just being in the presence of my parents. As it turned out, this was undoubtedly one of the best visits home I ever had with them. Even as a grown woman, I usually feel like a teenager when I’m with them… always trying hard to please, making sure my manners are above reproach, and generally being a ‘good girl’. But this time, for the first time ever, I feel like we turned a corner. I felt an overwhelming need to ‘do’ for them. I wanted to ‘do’ for them. Now, if you read that again you’ll understand what it is I’m trying to convey. My parents are the types that ‘take care of everyone and everything’. But, that’s not what I wanted, not this time. I wanted to do for them and for whatever reason, they surprisingly allowed me that selfish luxury without much of a debate. It was a beautiful thing that warmed me to my core.  We spent a week full of good fellowship. We spent time with their friends, at bingo, at Church for the pancake breakfast and the dinner club, with my brothers, and together… alone with my parents… at home. I drove them to doctor’s appointments and to the store and to the Church Christmas pageant rehearsal – I got to ‘do’ for them. Selfishly, I’ll admit that It was a wonderful feeling for me… hopefully for them, as well.  While I certainly realize that these are no extraordinary events, they are, nonetheless, events that I am not normally around to do. I would imagine if one is fortunate enough to live close to their parents, these events might seem mundane but when you do not have the luxury of helping out on a regular basis… these ordinary events and the time shared doing them, most certainly do become among the most memorable of a visit home.

During my visit home, my eldest brother, Johnny, arranged for me to visit his granddaughter, Savanna, at her daycare. I’ve seen pictures and heard stories, but I had not had the opportunity to meet her yet. As I arrived at her daycare, I was surprised to have been met at the door by a man that I grew up with and attended years of school with… Joe. You could have never convinced me a few decades ago that Joe would one day co-own and run a daycare… those are words you would never had seen in our yearbook projections. But, honestly, he seemed quite at home with the kids. A natural. It was heartwarming. And then, there was Savanna. The sweetest, most angelic face. A smile that brightened my day and a voice – a perfect little girl voice – that melted my heart. She looked up at me and said, “Are you Aunt Kat?” I became a big melted pool of raw emotion. And, with camera at the ready, began snapping pictures. She is such a happy child! She reached for my hand and lead me outside where she escorted me to a swing set, encouraged one young boy to ‘get off’ a swing, got on herself, and then said, “Push me.” And there we stayed. I don’t know how long. I only know that that time with her is forever emblazoned in my heart.  I can’t thank you enough, Johnny, for arranging that for me. Thank you!

I should digress long enough to say that my time with Savanna had come on the tail end of an emotional day for me. I had met a dear friend, Erika, at the gravesite of my lifelong friend – her niece – Shelly. We talked about Shell and remembered all the good times. I swear, I can honestly say, without hesitation, that Shelly will forever be one of the kindest souls I ever had the privilege to know. And, I am honored to have shared years with her! Many – no, most – of my childhood memories include Shelly. She even stood as one of my bridesmaids many, many years ago. It is not our place to question God or His plan – and I mean no disrespect in writing these words but, I just believe He got this one wrong. This woman, this incredible woman, was too young. Too dedicated to making other’s lives better. Too special. And, gone…too soon.  Erika and I decided lunch would be good. We went downtown Deland to a nice New Orleans style bistro. We enjoyed lunch and each other’s company.  It was good for both of us, I believe. As we finished lunch and headed back to my car; we waited for traffic to clear so I could pull out. Just then, my phone rang. My brother Billy was on the other end telling me to turn off my signal and kill the engine… what? Where are you? ‘Just do it,” he said. So, I did. Erika and I got out of my car and there, walking down the street, was my brother. (Man! This is a small town!) We had seen each other just the day prior but, still, it was good to see him.  With him was Cheri, a wonderful woman who works in Bill’s office. Cheri, God love her, has had a tough year. It was nice to see her and, despite the past few months, she was smiling. I expected nothing less from her! So, Cheri, God bless you and keep you and your family safe and well in the New Year – you are never far from my thoughts.

I dropped Erika back at her place of employment and continued with the plans for the rest of my day. I had left flowers (purple is Shell’s favorite color) at Shelly’s grave. Now, I had three white roses to lay on the graves of three other loved ones – also taken way too soon in their lives. Erin, my sister-in-law, is buried in Orange City next to her younger sister, Jamie. Very near them, is Dennis – my first kiss – Dennis. I spent time with each of them individually. I laid a white rose on each headstone. Talked to them and told them that they had not been forgotten and I recalled something special about each one. It was then, as I tossed tissues into the trash can, that I got the urge to call my big brother. I asked John to call Savanna’s daycare and authorize me to stop in for a visit. He did . And that’s how I got my groove back! After a roller-coaster day of emotions, I got to hold and play with my grand-niece and even though it was the first time we had ever seen each other, her smile made me feel like she knew we were family and that she was truly glad to see me. And that made me smile…and so did the $250 I won at Church bingo later that night!

As I prepared to leave my parent’s home and move along on my journey West, I felt great sadness. In one short week, I had become, once again, used to seeing my family every day. I got used to sharing meals with them, I got used to going places with my parents and I knew … I just knew… that my heart was going to be sad when the time came for me to leave. I knew that I was going to miss them all…. terribly. And I was right but I got to take many, many great memories with me...great memories, indeed! 

So, now that I finally feel like I have a handle on homeschooling, I'm going to school too.  Jason has been taking college classes for about six months now.  I'm so excited about starting a new journey of my own.  I adopted my children's education as my own project, but I feel like the groundwork has already been completed. 

I still can't really pursue my dream, midwifery, yet.  It's too time consuming to train for that while my little ones are little.  I decided to follow another passion of mine in order to complete a degree that could also be practical for income while I'm homeschooling and raising children: Writing.  I'm at the very beginning.  I have one term from Florida Metro University and probably some credits from the Navy, but I'm looking at spending the next 3-4 years working for a Bachelor's Degree.  The cool thing about a Professional Writing degree is that I can use it while I'm homeschooling, in birth advocacy, for pay, for non-profit, to write books, to write a column, as a stepping stone for Law School in the future. 

Yes, I realize it’s been awhile since I posted on the blog. My apologies. It’s hard to write about life when you are still staying in the home of the people you are writing about, you know?  Let me recap the last two weeks.

I left Virginia, co-pilot, Michele (above with her two sons), in the passenger seat and we headed to South Carolina where she would meet friends and I would continue on my journey solo. We spent a night in the hotel reliving our ‘C’ school days – or so it seemed – as we enjoyed a hotel picnic of pizza and soda (I can't find the picture, Shelly!) while watching true-crime television. I snapped a picture because for that exact moment in time was one we had lived decades earlier as students at YN-C school. A time in our lives that seems, we agreed, to have been lived lifetimes ago. We reminisced about those ‘C’ school days, the people and places – most of which couldn’t (or shouldn’t) be shared on an open blog! OMG, we laughed at ourselves and at that period of our lives when we were young and ambitious and  - dare I admit it – foolish. The night was – and we are - fabulous!

After a good night’s rest, I (minus my co-pilot) departed at dawn’s early light for my parent’s home in Central Florida. It was Friday, December 11^th and it was a great travel day. I so enjoy driving through the low country of South Carolina. I purposely left early enough to witness the sunrise over the water-logged South Carolina countryside. A site of sheer beauty; a sunrise so spectacular that it was, no doubt, brushed by the hand of God.

As I crossed the state line into my semi-native Florida, I made arrangements to lunch with my brother, Jimmy. It’s always a treat for me to see him. He’s one of the hardest working guys I know and I treasure every chance I get to visit with him. We met at the seafood restaurant and enjoyed a very nice lunch. After we said our goodbyes in the parking lot, I got into my car to head South when my phone rang. It was Jimmy. He asked if I had time to come see his new home… well, it’s not so new to him but I had never seen it. I was delighted for the invite and eagerly accepted. It’s a lovely home nestled in a quaint subdivision on the outskirts of Jacksonville. Jim’s pride and joy, a Chihuahua named Sweetpea, anxiously greeted us as the front door opened. At that moment, Jimmy transformed, right there before my eyes, from a truck driving; blue-collar, flag-waving, hard-working man. Tough as nails… or so I thought. But… when he saw his Sweetpea, he melted. He doted on her and played with her as I sat and watched...in awe.  Quickly, I grabbed my camera (always at the ready), and began snapping frames in an attempt to capture this sweet, unexpected side of my big brother. Just another sweet memory from this fabulous journey I’m on. I am so glad… so glad…. he made the call to invite me home. I can’t imagine having missed this moment.

White lights or colored lights? Blinking or non-blinking? Bonus points if you show us a photo of the lights you used to decorate for the holidays.

both and non blinking!